Tinsel Tricks

Recipient: herm42
Author: ladymoonray
Pairing: Elijah/Orlando
Rating: R


Elijah woke with the sound of bells ringing in his ears. Surely it couldn’t be Christmas yet? And where were the bells? He came round a bit more, and realised it was his old-fashioned Bakelite telephone. It’d been a housewarming present from Viggo. God, that man was weird.

He tumbled out of bed, bedclothes and all, and groped for the phone. Which was right by the bed, where he’d put it. Umm. Yeah. Good party last night.


“Morning Lij. It’s me!”“Orli! Great to hear from you, man. What’s up?”

Orlando giggled.

“How are you? Can I come visit?”

Elijah looked round his wreck of a house. Really good party. He took a deep breath.

“I’m fine. Well, sort of fine. And sure you can come visit. But you mustn’t mind the mess, OK? I had a party last night. Actually, no, wait. The party was the night before last. But I haven’t cleared up yet.”

“Lij, this is me we’re talking about. When have I ever minded a bit of a mess? But what’s the address? I don’t know where you live now.”

Elijah sighed.

“I sent it to you. Four times. But just ‘cos it’s you, here it is again.”

He gave Orlando the address.

“Cool! I’ll get in a cab and be there before you know it. Only, couldya, kinda, get dressed this time? It’s too early in the day for opening the front gate wearing just your boxer shorts. Not that it stopped you last time, but still. Do me the favour, OK?”

Elijah had no idea what Orlando was talking about, but that wasn’t so unusual. He started to reply, but the phone was already dead. Orli was on his way.

Orli was on his way! Thank goodness there hadn’t been anyone at the party he’d really wanted to sleep with. That could’ve been embarrassing; having to shove someone out of the door to make way for a famous boyfriend and long-awaited casual sex.

Would’ve been handy to have had someone to help clear up, though.

Elijah kicked a couple of pathways clear of beer bottles, tinsel and other debris, and decided that would have to do. He poured himself a glass of juice in the slightly less devastated kitchen, and sat down to wait.

Typical of Orlando to turn up with no warning. Elijah was just starting to wake up and think about what they might do. As usual, he had no idea how long Orli intended to stay. Probably not long, going by past experience.

The tinsel draped around the window frame was glinting in the sun. Elijah stood up and fingered it thoughtfully. He reached for his laptop, wondering if he could get some help with his idea.

A slow smile was just spreading across his face when the buzzer went off. Orlando was grinning outside the gate, and as Elijah pressed the button let him in, he did a little dance for the camera. Elijah’s smile grew wider.

Orli rushed in and threw himself at Elijah. Luckily they were both used to the routine by now, and Elijah managed not to end up in an undignified heap.

Ritual over, Orlando demanded the tour of Elijah’s new house. He pronounced it beautiful, and sighed his regret at having missed the obviously excellent party.

“Yeah, it was one of my better ones,” admitted Elijah. “We were supposed to be trimming the tree, but to be honest I forgot all about it.”

The tree sat lonely and abandoned in the corner of the family room. Decorations and Christmas lights were strewn just about everywhere else around the house.

“Actually, that’s cool,” said Orli. “I brought you a present.”

He reached into his rucksack, and brought out a small box.

“Oh Orli, you shouldn’t have!”

Orlando smirked.

“Yeah, you’re right. I probably shouldn’t.” Elijah wanted to cry with laughter when he drew the fairy out of the box. It was definitely a fairy, with a bell-shaped dress, little silver wings, and a pretty sparkly wand. But the black fishnets and shiny lace-up boots, and the handcuffs dangling from her belt, weren’t quite so conventional. He passed her to Orlando and indicated the top of the tree.

“Go on. She can sit up there for now, but I’ll have to take her down before Mum comes to visit.”

“Elijah, you are such a wuss. I bet your Mum would love her!”

Elijah shuddered at the thought.

“Anyway, look at this!”

Orlando manipulated the doll’s arm a little bit, and some tiny black filaments shot out of the end of the wand, turning it into a sparkly whip! Elijah fell into a fit of giggles. When he opened his eyes, the fairy was sitting on top of the tree in full bondage mode, and Orlando was close by his side. Probably too close. But he couldn’t bring himself to mind.

“C’mon. I need a shower. But I might get lonely.”

He’d deliberately left the wet room out of the tour he’d given Orlando. The family bathroom was spectacular enough to live up to the rest of the house, but his pride and joy was the en-suite to the main bedroom. Hidden behind a door that seemed to lead to one of the fitted wardrobes, there was a huge bathroom, featuring an open shower and beautiful black and mirror tiling. Well, he thought it was beautiful anyway. It should be; it was his own design.

Orlando was gratifyingly impressed. He fiddled briefly with the shower controls, managing to switch it on “accidentally“. Elijah let out a yell as he was immediately soaked through; t-shirt, shorts, sneakers and all. Orlando had managed to jump back and escape with slightly damp feet. Well, that wouldn’t do, would it?

Elijah grabbed him and shoved him under the water. Hmm. Not a bad idea. A wet Orlando with a clingy T-shirt and jeans. And he didn’t seem to be in any hurry to undress himself. Instead, he was tugging at Elijah’s own soggy t-shirt.

“Oh no you don’t.” Elijah pushed him off. “I’ve got plans for you.”

He drew himself up as tall as he could, and tried to look commanding.

“Get those wet clothes off, Orlando Bloom. Look at the state of you. Just what do you think you’re doing?”

Orli was obviously doing his best to look abashed, but he ruined it all by muttering, “Yes, miss,” while he pulled off his shirt.

Elijah scowled. But oh, Orli’d been working out again.

Elijah tried to keep a grip on himself as he stripped off his own wet clothes. He had to avoid looking at Orlando for the time being, otherwise the whole thing would be over way too soon.

“Get washed and then wait for me in the bedroom,” he commanded. Then he had to force himself to look at the ceiling (luckily, there were no mirror tiles up there) until Orlando had gone. He decided to forego his own shower for the sake of getting on with things.

“Eyes closed!”

Orlando was sprawled naked on his back on the bed, breathing hard. Excellent. Not much re-arranging required. Elijah dragged his eyes away, and padded through to the kitchen to find that tinsel. There really wasn’t enough of it in the kitchen, but luckily there was plenty more hanging over the back of the sofa. He collected a good supply and took it through to the bedroom.

“I said eyes closed!”

As far as he could tell, Orli hadn’t been peeking. But it wouldn’t do any harm to reinforce the message.

He took one brown wrist, forcing himself to be a little rough, and tied it tightly with one end of a shiny tinsel strand. Then he paused a moment. He’d almost forgotten something very important. He leaned carefully over and whispered in Orli’s ear.

“Elephants are safe, OK?”

Orlando was lying still and rigid, obviously biting his lip quite hard. He nodded briefly, and went back to his stillness.

Elijah pulled his arm out straight, and tied the tinsel tightly to the iron bed frame. His groin was aching despite his efforts not to look, and he started moving a lot more quickly. It only took a couple of minutes to finish tying up Orlando, and he could finally stand back and look.

Orli seemed more red than brown all over now, but that might just have been the contrast with the silver tinsel. He was still biting his lip, and breathing in long gasps. His cock was straining already, but there wasn’t much he could do against his tight bonds.

Elijah crept round to the other side of the bed, and leaned down again.

“No elephants?”

Orli shook his head impatiently.


Elijah really just wanted to jump on him there and then, but that wasn’t in the plan. They had agreed to use their time together to experiment. What could be safer than doing it with a trusted, gorgeous, and equally famous friend? That way they could both be sure that their most lurid tales wouldn’t end up in the newspapers. Girls and missionaries were all very well, but every now and then Elijah wanted something different. Luckily Orli did too.

Elijah picked up yet another piece of tinsel, and cruelly tickled the sole of Orlando’s right foot with it. The foot twitched against the shiny bonds, but Elijah had pulled them tight and it couldn’t move much. Orli opened his eyes and lifted his head to protest.

“I said eyes shut!” Elijah snapped.

Orlando’s head fell back immediately, and he resumed his rigidly still position. Elijah could see blood coming from his bitten lip, and his cock twitched in response. He climbed onto the bed, straddling Orli’s chest, and bent down to lick the trickle of blood. Orli opened his mouth in response, trying to capture Elijah’s tongue with his own. But Elijah pulled back. It wasn’t his tongue he wanted in Orli’s mouth.

He knelt forward and pushed his cock hard against Orli’s face. His friend caught on quickly, capturing it between his lips and sucking hard. Elijah gasped, and pushed his hips forward again. He’d have to finish quickly or he’d end up suffocating Orlando - which most definitely wasn’t in the plan.

Oh, that wasn’t going to be a problem; he could feel himself about to come. With a huge effort, he pulled back away from Orli’s face and sprawled on top of him, creating just enough friction to push himself over the edge. He moved gently through the orgasm, breathing hard, and then lay still to catch his breath.

Orli was good for a while, remaining still and quiet. But after a minute or two he started squirming; fair enough really, it was high time Elijah paid him some attention. But Elijah was tired, and sticky, and he really wanted a shower. And he wanted to see how far he could push Orli’s obedience. So he stilled the squirming with a firm hand on the arm, wriggled off the bed, and then waltzed off to take a shower.

He giggled quietly as he closed the bathroom door, taking one last look at a now-glistening Orlando stretched out on the bed.

“Hey, I heard that! Don’t you dare leave me like this - get back out here and untie me right now! LIJ! LIJ!

Elijah couldn’t stop laughing, but he was determined not to give in. He closed the door, climbed into the shower, and started to wash himself.

The door burst open, and Orlando stormed right into the shower - followed by a trail of four pieces of tinsel. Elijah opened his mouth to roar with laughter, and almost choked on a mouthful of water. Orlando didn’t even notice.

“You bastard, you tied them so tight I can’t even cut them off me! It’s a good thing you didn’t do so well with one of the knots on the bed frame. How could you leave me like that? I’m really going to get you for that. Lij? Lij? What are you doing?”

Elijah had had an idea. While Orli was ranting, he’d picked up the end of one of the soggy bits of tinsel and tied it (tightly and properly this time) to a towel rail on the wall. Then he skipped off out of the bathroom. When Orlando tried to follow him he was brought up short by the shiny tinsel strand. Elijah giggled his way off to the other bathroom to finish his shower. Orlando was going to be really, really mad when he finally got free. Elijah couldn’t help looking forward to it…


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Fabulous artwork ©2002 by Hope.
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