Sekrit Slasha

Slasha, Baby is the LOTR RPS Fanfiction holiday fic exchange. This story depicts real-life public figures engaged in completely fictional, false and untrue activities. It never happened. This story is a work of fantasy and satire which in no way professes to express the truth about the life, thoughts, feelings, desires, opinions, beliefs, activities or sexual orientation of any person mentioned herein.

A Priest and a Cat-boy Go into the Bedroom

Title: A Priest and a Cat-boy Go into the Bedroom
Pairing: Elijah/Orlando
Rating: NC-17
Summary: A costume party, sex ensues. Not really much in the way of plot.
Notes: Unadulterated PWP, not a shred of plot anywhere near this piece. Could basically take place anywhere along the timeline. Contains smut, costumes, and somewhat harsh dirty talking.

"Whose idea was it to do a costume party in December?" Orlando grimaced, adjusting the collar on his cassock.

"Do you even have to ask?" Dominic answered from the hotel room's tiny bathroom - the door partially open as he got into costume. "Elijah practically burst when he came up with the idea - he'd texted half the guest list before I even found out."

Orlando chuckled softly, "Sounds like him. I barely had time to pick something up the day before getting on the plane. He does realize that some of us are coming off of a job and don't really have the desire to wear costumes, doesn't he?"

Dominic made a noncommittal noise that most certainly implied that it was Lij and he tended to live in his own special little world where hopping on a plane after shooting for ten hours overseas to go to a costume holiday party was just what you did.

"Should I ring down to the car and let them know you're having trouble?"

"No, no." Dominic grunted, "Just getting the last bits together. Not like everyone else won't be fashionably late."

"There's a difference between fashionably late and just after half the guests have left." Orlando paused, fishing his mobile phone out of a less than convenient "convenience" pocket on the inside lining of the long gown. "He's already texted me twice."

"Twice? We're only ten minutes away."

"The first time was to ask if I was bringing anything."

"What'd you tell him?"

"We're riding together and I can't lift your stash of porn."

Dominic chuckled, ducking out of the bathroom. "I told you, I left the porn back home. I'm highly likely to actually engage in sex this week." He pushed back a stray strand of his long blonde wig, smudging the makeup across his temple with his pinky finger. "How do I look?"

"Like an albino Keith Richards." Orlando pocketed the phone, looking him over. "Is Billy going as Mick?"

Dominic tossed a wadded tissue his direction that fell to the floor well before reaching the target. "No! Come on, Interview with a Vampire? Lestat? Big film, Tom Cruise?"

"I'm familiar with it, but you still look horrible." Orlando flashed a smile, letting Dominic know he was mostly joking. "He's Louie, yah?"

Dominic nodded with a broad grin, "That was the plan; I haven't seen him yet though."

The hotel phone rang, drawing them out of the moment. As expected, it was their car - apparently the driver had better things to do and was about to leave. Hurried, they rushed down before he could pull away from the curb.


At Elijah's suite Orlando and Dominic parted ways - it had been an unexpected coincidence that they'd been able to share a flight and booked the same hotel, it didn't mean they were required to hang out together when they both had people they'd rather be with. Without a doubt, Dominic would be making a beeline for his Billy - it had been far too long since he'd made it out for a visit.

Orlando, he had other plans. Quietly friendly, he passed through the crowd towards the blasting stereo - keeping his eyes open for their host. It didn't take long to spot him sitting in a nest of pillows close to the music source, Elijah was dressed as a black cat and surrounded by a small circle of people Orlando recognized, but couldn't remember the names of. He approached from behind, catching the smile of an attractive blonde who clearly recognized him. Grinning, he placed a finger to his lips to shush her and hopefully her friends - it would be far more interesting to surprise their host.

"No, I'm just saying that it isn't really that good. I mean, you want to think it's genius because it doesn't sound like anything else commercially available but when you really listen to it, there's a good reason it doesn't sound like anything else. It's horrible." Elijah fidgeted with his paw gloves as he droned on about some band, undoubtedly the Europop trash he'd been digging most recently.

Crouching down as best he could in the heavy cassock, Orlando leaned in and whispered in the younger man's ear; "Care to confess, my son?"

Elijah sat up straight at the familiar tone against his ear, tilting his head back to offer a broad smile. "Oh my god, you made it and you're a priest." He laughed loudly, looking back to his friends. "If you will excuse me, lovely ladies, I believe I'm due for confession."

"Right, Lij... should only take a few hours and a few hundred prayers." The blonde rolled her eyes, watching his lithe body as he sprang up from the pillows.

"I believe he's been a good kitty this year." Orlando chuckled, letting Lij take him by the hand and pull him away from the gathering. "I'm sure the Lord will go easy on him."

"Fine words for a false teacher." Elijah shouted over the din of the music, taking Orlando through the growing throng of bodies towards an unknown destination. "I can't believe anyone actually dressed up! Isn't it amazing?"

"It's your party." Orlando responded, unsure if he had even been heard. After what seemed like ages of passing faces and friendly sounding shouts their direction, Elijah tugged him hard into a small bedroom - locking the door behind them.

"God I'm so glad to see you." Elijah grinned, letting out a soft groan when Orlando swept him into a tight embrace. "It's been forever."

"Too long." Orlando responded, kissing him on the forehead - then his bared throat. "I've missed you."

"Me too." Elijah put a firm palm against Orlando's face, guiding him into a soft kiss on the lips.

With a low murmur, Orlando pushed Elijah backward towards the bed, squeezing his arms tighter around his waist. "We don't have much time." He breathed, digging in for another kiss - more roughly than before.

Elijah moaned under his breath, collapsing against the bed as he felt it brush against the back of his knees. "Probably not."

Orlando looked down at him with a soft grin, and then ran his fingers over the sash at the waist of his robe. "Feels a bit more clandestine that way, doesn't it?"

"From a man dressed as a priest, no less." Elijah took off his cat ears, rubbing his pawed hand over his spiky hair.

"To man in a skintight Lycra bodysuit." Orlando smirked, opening the sash and letting it drop down beside his shoes.

"So, is there anything under your cassock - Father?"

"Mmm, I'll hear your confession before you find out." Orlando chuckled again, shifting slightly. "I'm sure you've got your share of sins this year."

"Only the ones I commit with you." Elijah's smirk seemed to twist even higher. "Forgive me Father, for these things I do."

"But you do them so very well." Orlando answered, opening the top three buttons and letting the collar pop loose. Without much effort, the heavy robe joined his sash and was followed by a thin t-shirt and jockey shorts. "More appropriate for the scene?"

"Shut up." Elijah giggled, taking him by both hands and giving a rough tug. "Come on then. It's better down here."

"Ahh, that sort of hurry then?" Orlando let Elijah pull him down onto the bed, sure to push him up against the pillows. "Where did we leave off last time? If I remember we were quite rudely interrupted."

Elijah giggled again, struggling off his paw socks and gloves. "Christ, like I remember... it was... ehm... June?"

"Mmmhmm." Orlando nodded, rewarding him with a kiss against his collar bone before finding the tab for the thin zipper at the front of Elijah's bodysuit. "Summer, in Australia."

"On the beach." Elijah closed his eyes, tugging his legs out of the tight fabric - barely noticing the suit bunched up around his shoulders to keep it away from the pertinent area of the moment. "Must have been... two or three in the morning?"

"Two-thirty." Orlando murmured, pressing soft kisses across Elijah's bare chest down to his navel. Teasing, he flicked his tongue across the tender flesh of his belly - drawing out a soft giggle. "You were on your back in the sand, staring up at the stars."

"No." Elijah said, his breath taking a much more hushed tone. "No, I was watching your face as I fucked you - telling you I was about to -"

"Not yet." Orlando groaned, kissing Elijah's slender thighs - gently nuzzling his cheek against Elijah's rapidly rising arousal. "How did I look?"

"Egotistical shit." Elijah giggled, and then moaned as Orlando's warm mouth enveloped his cock - his tongue teasing along the underside. "You looked magnificent, like you were born to be fucked." Orlando groaned deep in his throat, following it with a hard swallow - drawing out another low moan. "Like you were the biggest slut who wanted nothing more than my cock fucking you until you just couldn't take it anymore."

Orlando shuddered, rolling his hips in anticipation before pulling up off the hardness with a loud groan. "Mmm, you liked it though."

"Hell yes, I did." Elijah opened his eyes, catching Orlando's gaze only a moment. "I love fucking you."

"You do." Orlando grinned, licking his lips with a sleepy grin.

"You want me to fuck your brains out, or are you gonna make me squirt in your pretty mouth." Elijah blushed slightly even as he said the words, clearly not used to taking such a verbal lead.

"Fuck me." Orlando groaned, crawling up to straddle his partner's hips. "Please."

"Tell me how bad you want it." Elijah reached across the bed and snatched a shiny red package out of a small bowl of various candy colored condoms on the nightstand. "You can get anyone you want, but nobody fucks you like I do, do they?"

"No." Orlando whined softly, shaking his head as he lowered his eyes. "Nobody. Not like this."

Elijah grinned wider, rolling the condom on with several quick paced strokes - drawing himself almost fully hard. "Nobody knows how big of a fucking slut you are."

"Yeah." Orlando breathed, closing his eyes tight as he lowered himself on all fours - knowing all too well the perfect angle. "That's right."

"Guide my cock, slut." Elijah ordered quietly, reaching up and raking his fingers through Orlando's hair - actually quite pleased it was longer than the last time they'd been able to connect.

Orlando let out a soft whine - not quite a whimper - and did as he was told, finding the hard shaft easily and guiding it against his opening. He'd been prepared; it always seemed to happen that way - a pretense party followed by several minutes of mild berating and a quick rough fuck before slipping back into the party supposedly unnoticed. It took a little getting used to, but after the first several times they'd both learned exactly the buttons to push to make it go quick and easy. "Please." He whispered.

"Louder." Elijah twisted his hand just the slightest bit, pulling a handful of soft hair into a tight knot. "Beg."

"Please fuck me." Orlando whispered again, licking his lips before pushing his voice as loud as he would allow. "Fuck me, Lij. I need you, now."

"Good enough." Elijah groaned, lifting his hips to tease the tip against Orlando's opening - letting out a slow whine as Orlando pushed himself down.

"Oh god." Orlando shuddered hard, grinding himself down against Elijah's narrow pelvis. "So good..."

Elijah leaned back against the pillows, grasping at the bedspread with both hands. He knew what worked, just lean back and take it. "Good little slut."

Orlando inhaled sharply and picked up a nearly frantic rhythm - muttering a string of obscenities as he rocked harder.

"Oh fuck, god fuck..." Elijah moaned, biting down into Orlando's palm as it was cupped over his mouth to stifle the noise. Before he even had time to process what was going on, he felt the warm heat of Orlando's cum across his belly.

Orlando dug himself down hard, squeezing Elijah's body between his knees as he came unexpectedly fast. Elijah writhed and bit down into his hand even harder than before, it was all they needed.

slashababy was created by megolas, revised by yueni
fabulous artwork \0xA92002 by Hope
now moderated by MSilverstar & feelforfaith