Slashababy 2004 Stories

  FANFICTION: This story depicts real-life public figures engaged in completely fictional, false and untrue activities. It never happened, it never will happen. This story is a work of fantasy and satire which in no way professes to express the truth about the life, thoughts, feelings, desires, opinions, beliefs, activities or sexual orientation of any person mentioned herein.

A Bit Of What You Fancy...

for chimerablack
by lucky_jack

slight fluff, first time and/or first date

The gratuitous use of porn mags hadn't helped and nor had phoning his newly-single-ex-girlfriend at four in the morning for a smutty phone call full of promises of no-strings-attached sex. Even glancing at the 'Page 3 Birds of the Year!' Christmas pullout section in The Sun (especially purchased for the job from the 'we sell foreign papers' shop down the road) had made no difference to the raging hard-on Dom had been getting each time he thought of Billy's impending visit to Hawaii. Dom knew he was straight. Dom knew that he was the original Mr Lova Lova Man when it came to the ladies, but each time he pictured Billy asleep in the spare room next to his, his stomach did that particularly girly flip-thing and sent jolts of longing to his cock. In the past, he'd put this down to a normal masculine reaction towards being starved of sex for a long time. Hell, even the Alsatian next door looked good when he hadn't got his rocks off for a while. This time, however, his excuse didn't work. He'd had a few good shags lately and now that Shona was free again, he could get it any time he wanted it. If he wanted it. Which he didn't... ..with her anyway. Fuck!

Dom pulled himself off the sofa, rearranging his newly-tight jeans/groin area to a more comfortable arrangement and began to do the tidying up that he'd been avoiding all morning. Out with the discarded roll-ups and empty beer bottles, in with the air freshener and cushions in an arrangement straight out of an Ikea showroom. That ought to do it.

Elijah and Sean were running a bit late too. Dom wondered just what Sean had told himself this time about just why he was leaving Christine alone with the kids in the holidays. He always had the most spectacular talent for self-deception. Christine won't mind. Christine likes a bit of space after Christmas. Christine like me to see Elijah once in a while. She understands guys, honestly. Dom wondered if she'd understand quite so much if she could see Sean following Elijah round with doe eyes on the stroke of midnight each New Year's Eve, the longing and denial evident on his glazed and drunken face. But perhaps Christine knew, she wasn't stupid after all, and women usually have an instinct in these matter don't they? Perhaps she thought 'well, as long as nothing happens, where's the harm'. Perhaps.

The doorbell rang and Dom just about heard it above The Wu Tang Clan. 'It's about bloody time the pair of them got here', he thought. Elijah had a talent for getting lost, unsurpassed by even Lord Lucan, but they were late even by his princely standards. Grabbing a spare piece of mistletoe and puckering his lips up in a comedy manner, Dom opened the door.

"Why Dominic Monaghan, I'm not that kind of girl... oh hell, go on then".

Dom's eyes opened in surprise as Billy planted a firm kiss on his lips and pinched his bum in a vicious and provocative (to his mind) manner.

"You're way early", Dom grinned as he closed the door behind Billy, a warm and distinctly un-masculine feeling pooling in the pit of his stomach, far too near his groin for his own personal comfort.

"I can go to the pub and come back later if you like".

"Yeah, see you then", said Dom opening the door and then immediately closing it again. "I'm funny".

"You're funny Dom".

"Come in mate, grab a beer, relax".

At ten to midnight the relaxing was reaching fever pitch in a bar just off the main street in the town. Elijah and Sean were in their annual position, stuffed into the corner of the room and talking with earnest, drunken faces about fate, the universe and their place in it. Sean was hanging on every word that Elijah's pretty lips emitted whilst Elijah pretended not to notice Sean noticing him. It was like a very intricate dance and any minute one of them was going to put a foot wrong and fuck the whole thing up. Dom was fascinated and so was Billy.

"Do you think they've ever, you know, like, done anything?" asked Billy, his head cocked to one side and his hand running up and down his beer bottle absently.

"Nah. Elijah's straight as a die and Sean is determined to pretend that he is too. It's a tragic little scene really", replied Dom, staring at his shoes.

"I'm not so sure", said Billy quietly. "You just can't second guess people can you? I mean, you can never truly know what you'd do in any situation until you try it out eh?"

Dom risked a look at Billy but Billy was not risking a look at him. Probably a good thing, he thought. "Happy New Year mate", he said and they hugged tight and hard, for perhaps a second or two longer than was necessary.

They departed the bar at a very tame 3.00am for the comforts of a warm house and better, cheaper beer. The party was minus Elijah and Sean who had gone missing at some point after midnight. Billy and Dom had supposed they had gone home and would find them on the doorstep like two drunken waifs. It was an amusing thought anyway.

"So are you happy here?" asked Billy after a period of strange silence.


"In Hawaii. Are you happy?"

"I suppose", said Dom after a while. "The weather's great, the surfing's good. The work is interesting".

"And?" asked Billy.

"And what?"

"Any relationships? Is there a Mrs Monaghan that I don't know about?" Billy caught Dom's eye and cocked his eyebrow.

"Well, no. Not really. Nothing to speak of". Dom felt his heart to a pathetic little twist in his chest. "Eternally single. You know how it is. Well, I guess you don't actually. How's Ali?"

"Oh, ok, you know. We haven't seen each other for a while".

Dom stopped in his tracks and looked at his best mate. "Pardon?"

"We're sort of on a break right now".

Dom was way, way on the far side of gobsmacked. "But I thought you were both so... On a break? Like Ross and Rachael?" The tension broke although something else took its place. Billy laughed and nodded. "God man, I'm sorry. That's... " Dom struggled not to voice the word 'great' that treacherously rose to mind, "shit", he added lamely.

"Yeah". Billy stood where he was, his hands thrust in his pockets and his eyes piercing holes in Dom's feet.

"Can I give you a girly hug?" asked Dom, taking a step forward.

Billy smiled. "I'll try not to scream".

They stepped awkwardly into each other's arms and tensed for a moment before relaxing totally against each other as they had done a thousand times before. Dom's heart was hammering against his chest as Billy's head sunk down onto his shoulder. The urge to run his fingertips over Billy's back was all consuming and his inner mantra of 'I'm straight, he's straight, I'm straight, he's straight' didn't seem to be helping. Dom clenched his teeth and summoned up the will to let go. He drew in a breath and began to push away but found himself locked in place by Billy's tight grip. And then he felt it. The shock of Billy's rough, chapped lips on the side of his neck. A moment's confused check to ascertain whether this could be a mistake, that Billy had just brushed against him by mistake? Because obviously this couldn't be happening, right?

No mistake. Billy's lips continued their slow ascent up Dom's neck until they reached his chin. Dom closed his eyes and savoured the sensation until, just as suddenly as it had started, it stopped. He was afraid to open his eyes for a second in case he didn't like what he saw. He didn't want to see Billy flustered and embarrassed and repentant and on the rebound and confused.

"Dom?" the voice was quiet but insistent. Dom opened his eyes and looked into Billy's. "Dom, do you want me to stop? Because I will if you want. We can forget all about this. I think we can anyway. If you want to".

"Do you want to?" Dom found his voice. "Stop I mean?"

Billy smiled. "No, not really".

Dom smiled back. "Even though I have the beard of Grizzly Adams?"

Billy gave Dom a piercing gaze. "You can't joke your way out of everything Dom". A ghost of a smile spread over his face as it closed against Dom's once more and they kissed again. And kissed. And kissed some more.

The rest of the journey home was taken at a languorous pace, hand in hand, drunk but not too drunk, quiet but happy. They let themselves into Dom's apartment, the door unlocked much to the owner's astonishment and chagrin, and made their slightly embarrassed and bashful way to Dom's bedroom to finish what they had started several years ago on a film set in New Zealand. Dom reached his hand around and switched the light on, only to find Elijah and Sean curled up in bed together, asleep and naked as they day they were born.

"Fuck me!" exclaimed Dom and immediately lowered his voice. "I never would have thought... I mean... Elijah and Sean. Poor Christine. I mean Sean I can kind of understand but Elijah... "

Billy shut Dom up, his lips pressed firmly against the other man's in an ever-deepening kiss. When he finally pulled away, he looked speculatively at Dom and smiled.

"Well", he said, "stranger things have happened at sea. And after all, perhaps a little of what you fancy does you good?"


Slashababy 2004 Stories